Day 10

Hello! So today was amazing! The walkers completed Day 2, 40 miles behind them and 20 more to go.  The beautiful Karen Turner was on the injured list and I had the privilege of walking the last 6 miles with her. What a blessing.  More than ever, I know I want to walk next year.  Watching and cheering from the sidelines is great but the people who meet and the stories they share while walking are so incredible!

So my feet and my knee hurt but only a little and it was totally worth it!!!! I made an amazing new connection and I made today count!

Now...home to ice my knee, rest, medicate, sleep and cheer them on tomorrow!

Day 10

Day 2 of the Susan G Komen 3 day walk for a cure has already begun.  The walkers had to be the starting line at 6:30 this morning.  The "support crew" as we refer to them for Jordan's school documentary more commonly known as the "Tit Crew" (play on pit crew for those of you still waking up) are up and getting ready at the condo. They try to be at every cheer station, pit stop, of course lunch and finish line each day. Cheering on not only our own walkers but the other 5,000 people walking to save their mom, daughter, sister and fathers. Men make up 1% of those affected by breast cancer!

Not sure what my Day 10 will bring. I'm going to continue the documentary, continue talking to people and asking them to share their stories with me. I've had people tell me that my attitude is inspiring but for me, these are the inspirations.  The people who walk not out of their own need for survival but for the need of those they love. I am in awe of each of you!!!

Special shout-out to Mrs. Suarez... you're texts always come at exactly the right time, even if my phone died! Love you girl!  Okay.. it's still early...make today count, I want to hear all about it!

Day 9

Rough start to the morning... headed over to the ER around 5:30 am.  Confirmed case of strep throat and strep in my right kidney. IV antibiotics, steroids and pain meds on board.  A couple of prescriptions and I was out of there! I actually spent the rest of the day cheering on the walkers for Day 1 of the 3 Day.  It was so amazing to see almost 5,000 walkers all with one goal... to END BREAST CANCER!

So first...the reason for the blog.... again today was more about what people gave me, not what I was able to do for them.  I talked to over 30 people and they allowed me to share their story. Who they were walking for, who they walked in memory of. I prayed with several. I hugged even more! It was incredible that they would allow me inside their world and share their stories.  Jordan will have a lot of tape to use for his documentary.

My great news for today... I was accepted into the clinic in Houston!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Half sick, very medicated, I sat in shock as she gave me the good news... so in just a couple of days.... we're Houston bound! And this came to mind today.. it's one I've posted more than once on my fb page but I've been holding onto this one for awhile now(thanks gorgeous Jessi Olson)

"Courage does not always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day that whispers, I will try again tomorrow.”

Day 8

Hi happy followers! So I'm sick :(  Fever, bodyaches, sore swollen throat.  I arrived safely in San Diego around 1:00 local time and have been in bed since.  The hug from my mom was so nice. I hadn't seen her in a while and it made me realize how much I missed her and how much comfort her arms offered. As we walked out of the airport, I felt like somewhat of a celebrity.  The Boot Scootin Boobies were there to welcome me to California and each of them had cameras pointed my way. I love you guys but I looked just awful! If I'm going to feel like a celeb, I'm going to need full hair and make-up....

So as I came down the stairs to blog... I admitted to everyone that I felt awful.  I've been sick and with the exception of throwing up on the guy in the seat next to me on the plane, I really haven't done anything for anyone else. They all told me that coming here, even sick had made their day and that I had given them that. I think they're all just trying to be nice but today, I'll take it. As soon as I post this, it's back to bed. Early to rise... the walkers have to be there at 6:00 am and the support staff (I'm one of those) will follow shortly after.

I have to be honest, I'm a little apprehensive.  I am looking forward to this so much but I know that emotionally, it will be hard. My mom started this because of me.  These ladies walking with her, without knowing me, love me.  There will be other fighters and survivors there. There will be those who did not win their fight heavy on our hearts. And I will be there .... in the midst of my greatest battle... fighting to survive, fighting to be here to raise my children, fighting to be a wife, daughter, sister and friend...

We get the big news tomorrow... acceptance to the clinic in Houston... I'll update each of you as soon as they call! Thursday's almost over... did you make it count?

dDay 8

So yesterday was really all about other people doing things for me.  First my job made me an offer to stand by me, support me and help me in anyway they can. Second, someone allowed me to pray for his wife with him....he had never prayed out loud before! I told that's how we do it in the south! And then last night, while packing for my trip today...we discovered that the tapes we bought for the camcorder had caused it to malfuntion.  Well...I'm suppose to be documenting this trip and the people I meet for Jordan's documentary on "the faces of breast cancer".... that was going to be hard to do with no camcorder! Jason went to target and after explaining the situation, Cassandra, a manager there GAVE him a brand new Sony camcorder for free! Jason almost cried right there in the store and I did cry when he came home and told me. How amazing!!!!!

So I'm sitting at the airport (sick as a dog) waiting on my flight. I've been up since 1:40 with a fever and bodyaches but I am not going to miss this trip for the world! Tomorrow morning I'll be at the starting line with my mom and her incredible team and on Sunday, I will be right there at the finish line waiting for her!!!! I have a feeling this is going to be a very emotional trip. Look out San Diego....the Boot Scootin Boobies are takin over!

Day 7

Is it possible that my blossoming blogging career is already one week old??? My how time flies when you're having fun. So I've been trying to decide what to do about work. I only work part-time but the income is definitely needed in a family of six.  But with everything else, I've been wavering on spending my time with the kids, being able to seek out new treatments (especially if I'm going to have to travel to Houston) or not putting the added stress on my husband financially.  He supported me either way and left the choice up to me. Originally, I had my mind set on quitting. But I honestly work for the best company ever! I only work when the kids are in school (so that reason didn't really hold water) and after talking to my boss (and owner of the company) he told me that they would give me whatever time I needed.  They would continue to be flexible and support me thru treatments, even if they are in Houston! What a good way to start my Wednesday. 
Not sure what I'm doing for Day 7 yet. Waiting for God to present that opportunity. And I'm trying to think of something extra meaningful to say this morning because my fabulous girlfriend ... Ms. Heather King... set my blog as her home page and now I'm really feeling the pressure! lol

So for this morning ... I'll leave it with this... “It doesn’t matter where you are right now, you are nowhere compared to where you can go.” ~ Bob Proctor 

Til later....

Day 6

I almost feel hungover from all the excitement yesterday! The headache is back and in full force but I'm trying not to let it get the best of me. I leave for my trip the day after tomorrow and with work and kids and home, I have a lot to do before I can head out of here. My son Jordan (14 yrs old.. future movie producing superstar) is doing a documentary and has chosen to make me the subject. I'm both honored and horrified.  I love to TAKE pictures but to be in them, not really my thing. But reluctantly, I agreed.  I'll be taking the camera with me and video taping the journey thru this weekend. I'm secretly a little excited! This could be my big break into Hollywood.... holla!
Today is a cool good deed... Jason (gorgeous husband) and I get to take the first load of toys that we've been collected at my work and drop them off for the Christmas drive at the shelter. I've been on the receiving end of help at Christmas and without that help, my kids would have had nothing. It was amazing to me to be "Santa" this time. To be the one delivering the toys that would help someone's Christmas. As the child getting the toy, smiles, smiles, smiles. As the parent of the child, it was such a relief for me knowing that for just a little while longer, I was able to keep the truth of a sometimes cruel world from the minds and hearts of my own children and now I got to pass that on to another parent.
What has your Tuesday brought? Any opportunity? Yesterday Jordan told me that we all help someone everyday and that most of the time we don't even realize we've done it. Is that true for you today?

Day 5

Today has been INCREDIBLE!!! First... I'm waiting to hear back from a clinic in Texas that specializes in Specific Gene Therapy .... why doesnt every oncology office treat cancer this way????? I will find out if I have been accepted.... best part...when they call with the news on Friday...I will be in San Diego with my mom at the Susan G Komen 3 day. My mom wll be walking. It was in my plan to go next year but with my health, we're not sure that will be possible.  The most amazing people came together and made sure that I could be there this year, this week!!!!!! For me..... I am in awe of their spirits and giving hearts. To worry about someone they do not know. There are no words that express how grateful I am. What a day!!!

Ok onto the reason behind the blog.... what did I do with Day 5?  Well I'm going to be honest.... I was feeling guilty that I didn't do more. Today I was able to introduce someone with a couch to give to someone without a couch. I didn't give it but my husband did offer to pick it up and move it up two flights of stairs. I managed to work a little, pray a lot, I had to remind my 6 year old that his teacher is someones momma and deserves as much respect as he gives his own (there was a tongue sticking out incident)  and I found out that my 7 year old loves me "a little more" than cartoons.... today was a great Monday! Did you make the most of your Monday? It's almost over and you can never get it back. If not...here's the best part.... you can start fresh tomorrow morning....make the most of it...

Day 4

Good morning! For those of you paying attention... it's actually the morning of day 5.  I had no internet at the house yesterday and blogging from my phone has turned out to be harder that I expected! And there must have been something in the air yesterday because I was feeling so "blah" and didn't even manage to get out of bed until almost noon.  I forced myself to get up and get out of the house. I was able to buy a meal for a vet down on his luck and I saved $200 on a laptop for my daughter because Walmart ACTUALLY price matched a sale ad from Best Buy... all in all not a bad day.

So I'm waiting this morning... waiting for my opportunity to to do something for someone else. Hope you had a great weekend and that you are making the most of this Monday!

Day 3

Sorry day 3 comes so late.  We had to leave our dinner with friends early last night due to a horrible headache.  Problem was...nothing I took or did helped so I woke up this morning just as miserable! Slight relief came when I went to Tree Shade massage on the westside of Colorado Springs. Hands down it was the BEST massage I've ever had in my entire life! I'm not sure if it was the pain, the slight relief, or this weeks stress but I literally cried ... the massage was so good! After the massage I stpped to have lunch with Kris, one of the funniest and best friends I have...(and trust me just that mention will go directly to his already big head!) Lunch was different.  When I walked in, the bartender, also a friend asked if I was having my usual (bacardi and coke...yum!) and I told her that my usual would be different from here on out. I had water... I figure everything I put in my body is going to determine how quickly I beat this! Anyway...lunch was good (and free...thanks Kris!) and I was home to nap before taking my boys to the movies. I am so tired lately but never let myself slow down before. No more...when I'm tired...I'll rest... has to help... right!
So the important stuff... Day 3! Theres a sweet young couple that just moved into the complex I manage.  They work hard and are expecting their first baby.  Like many young couples, the extras (like food) are hard to come by right now. Armed with five bags of groceries (that with coupons I only spent $30.24 on) I was off.  I was so excited ... when we got thereb they werent home.  I tried to call but had to leave a message, vmail! Didn't they plan on my suprise or more importantly...didn't they know I had to fill you guys in! Hello! We ended up leaving the bags in the fridge at the clubhouse and left a message and telling them something was in there for them. I'll have to update you on the outcome.  As for the headache, still here .... hoping for a great nights sleep and some relief. Hope you are having  a fantastic weekend... and for pete's sake...someone have a bacardi and coke for me!

Followers

So I'm up to 8 followers... I told a good friend today that I feel like the Ashton Kutcher of cancer blogs! I just wanted you guys to know that I LOVE getting the comments. I look forward to them popping up on my phone all day :) Without realizing it.. you're words keep me excited about my new blogging experience... even though it's already been two whole days!

Day 2

So this is so much more theraputic that I expected. The first thing on my mind this morning was what I was going to do for Day 2... not that I was still sick, or had things at work, what was I going to do with my Day 2.  So I normally stop at McDonalds on my way to work in the morning.  For whatever reason, I decided that I wanted to pay for the person behind me in line. Nothing huge, but a nice blessing for someone's Friday.  Here's the deal.... have you ever decided you were going to do something and then something will come up or something will happen and you didn't do it? That almost happened to me this morning! I pull into the McDonald's parking lot with my big Day 2 plan already in mind and this lady zooms around me and cuts me off. I pull into the outside lane of the drive thru and by some chance...she's the person behind me.  I'm going to be honest, for a split second I thought about changing up this master plan! But I pulled up, paid for my meal and then asked if I could pay for the person behind me. The girls seemed surprised but charged my card for both orders. I asked her just to tell the woman that I said, "have a great day" ...As I pull forward I see the woman hold her money out of the window and try to pay. She yelled a nice thank you and I was off to work.
I could have been swayed by something so small. Before my 1825 started, I may have! Now on with the rest of my day. Work til 2, then ITopit with my boys and a very dear friend and her boys. Dinner with other friends and a movie with my husband and kids.  It's so crazy but very small things I've always done seem so much more important now. As crazy as it sounds, today I am thankful that I'm sick.

Day 1

After I posted this morning...I was off to save the world.  I was on the phone with Tiffany (she's the best friend) discussing my assault on positive energy and this new revolation that I'd had since my breakdown yesterday. At that moment, a car driving northbound on the southbound side of the Interstate drove right past me. I had to laugh at the irony. Here I am trying to "cope with the expiration date" he'd given me yesterday and this guy could have ended the 1825 day journey on Day 1! It was confirmation for me that I was on the right path.... none of us are gauranteed a tomorrow so making the most of today is something I should have been doing all along!
On to my challenge....today was a success! While standing in line at Wal-Mart to pay, I noticed a young lady in front of me. She looked about 18 or 19. She seemed frustrated and as I stepped forward, I noticed that she was paying for a baby food and diapers with her change jar. I stepped forward and asked if she'd miht if I paid this time. Without a beat, tears filled her eyes. I smiled, swiped my card and as she said thank you... I remembered being her when my daughter was little. I became a mom at 16 and struggled to do the best I could. I told her it was my pleasure and to hang in there, things do get easier... I laughed and told her that "eventually they move out and get a job!" She laughed and stepped forward to hug me. I gave her a hug and handed her the bag and she was off. I'm sure I helped her but without knowing it, she helped me. I know today mattered. And thats what the 1825 is all about.
Now for p.j's and a movie, snugge time with my favorite guys..... I'll talk to you on Day 2!

Day 1

An expiration date. That's what I feel like he handed me yesterday. I've been battling breast cancer for 6 years already... we thought we had gotten to the part where we could finally breath. I could finally feel safe in my own skin. That was a month ago. And in an instant... a tiny .33 mm mass in my knee brought it all back. I forged on. I started radiation that week.... You don't know me yet but I am literally the most positive person on the planet. Not in a omg, this woman is crazy and has no idea what's going on positive but my glass has never been half empty...when it gets low.. I add Bacardi! For six years I've refused to let cancer win. Refused to let it even slow me down. But for some reason, this time is different. For some reason... this morning looked different. I spent last night scared. I spent last night on my what if's, I cried, I drank, I cried some more, I brought the kids in bed with us and layed there watching them sleep. And then it hit me... this is God offering me a gift. I have 1825 days to make it count. And in the end of those 1825 days, when I beat this damn cancer and I've run out of days to countdown. I will have changed not the world around me, but the world WITHIN me.
I've never blogged. I've never even considered it. But should this fight be one I don't win... I wanted my children to be able to look back on something and be able to say that their mother went down fighting. That she made ever second count. So here's what I'm thinking... I'm going to do something for someone else, every single day and in the end, I would have done 1825 things to change my own life. So I'm off.. for Day 1.